Twisted Sense Of Humor

The universe has a twisted sense of humor. But a sense of humor none the less. Take my father, for instance. When I was growing up, he made it a point to remind us that he didn't want us and did not love us, on a regular basis. He used to remind us, just in case we got confused when he was occasionally nice to us. So typically if he did slip up and have a good time with us, he'd take it back quickly. "Don't think this means I love you," he'd say.

Now you may think he was making a joke. You might want to believe he wasn't serious. Well you'll just have to trust me on that. He was serious. He wanted us to know he didn't love us. He demonstrated that in more ways than one. There were the little things, like taking the food from our dinner plates if he thought it looked tasty. And there were the big things, like the welts on our backsides if we looked at him the wrong way. Sometimes he spanked us for nothing. He said it was a reminder not to do anything wrong. Come right down to it, he enjoyed tormenting his children. It made him feel powerful. He had a little brass bell that he would ring in the morning when he woke up. We were required to line up at attention at the foot of the bed, to await his bidding. Well I could tell you more, but you get the gist of it.

Now, at 80, he's an old man with a failing mind, and he doesn't remember any of that stuff. It's hard to tell if it's selective forgetting or senility, but whichever it may be, he's conveniently forgotten what an SOB he was to grow up with. Be that as it may. But here's the irony. Nowadays, when he sees me, he always gets this surprised look on his face. And then as if it's a revelation, he tells me he loves me.

Like I said, the universe has a twisted sense of humor.